My medical boards test day in a nutshell…

Test begins and several questions in:

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Turning point during test:

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Post test:

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Home:

Did I mention I have to have my whole apartment packed and moved in 36hrs?

Wine and packing…haha, that can’t be a good combination!

Great job to all the peeps who suffered through boards today! Go have celebratory drinks for me and enjoy the rest of your Summer!!

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When I momentarily debate on wearing Depends during my boards exam to avoid using the bathroom while testing

A part of me thinks it’s a good idea…while the other part says it’s a crazy idea:

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Ultimately, my inner Cuddy won (FOR ONCE!!). Like I said…it was just a passing thought. Crazy thoughts and ideas are side effects of my burn-out. But wouldn’t it be great to stay well-hydrated while maximizing test time? Catheter maybe? Hahahaha, I kid..I kid 😉

 

Averting a last minute panic attack the day before boards…

Had to smack some sense into myself:

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*Inject fake confidence* and 5 minutes later…

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Last weekend before boards…

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I find myself fluctuating between feeling indifferent to having full-on murderous anger. I’m happy to soon get boards over with, but I’m dreading the action of getting it done. A part of me wants to be left alone this weekend to process my feelings and do my final study reviews. However, there is also a part of me that says “F**k this test! I’m not reading or doing another damn thing and it’s time to get mutha-truckin TURNT UP!”

Alas, I abandon my wild impulses and quietly return to studying; meanwhile, I have occasional thoughts of eating a salty gluten-filled soft jumbo pretzel since I’m now on day 26 without eating sugar or gluten. Hmm, perhaps that’s partially why I want to murder someone too!

 

When someone tries to make small talk and…

You’re either:

A.) In the middle of studying

B.) Trying to rush and get somewhere

C.) Have 99 problems but a bitch ain’t one!

Hahaha! Now, I’m such a nice sucker that I usually indulge people to a certain degree. However, don’t you sometimes wish you can just tell folks to “Shut-up” point blank without them getting all butt-hurt?? Maybe not say it that harsh, but I do think good boundary setting is essential if you ever want to get sh*t done!

When I “people-watch” in a cafe to take a break from boards studying

I think…

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When a patient says “I have a tight ass” during the digital rectal exam

It took everything I had to fight back laughing while I was still in the room:

Trying not to laugh

Even now, I’m still cracking up from the fact someone actually said that while a clinician’s finger was still examining the patient’s bumhole. The patient was serious about the comment, but definitely meant it for some humor too.  I’m telling you folks, this stuff is too good to make up!

It’s moments like these where being in clinic and working with patients reminds me why I love my job!